PR/JavaRay

[Benchwarmer#1]

So java has friends now? God, you guys are so gullible. He's not even a real buc fan.

It's OK though speedy. I've spent a fair amount of time telling plenty of people about this MB and it's allowance of racism. I'm personally done with hoping PR does something about this. They can leave Java on here, but they better not expect me to go easy on him, or buy anything from them. Hell, I may even hit up some news channels and see if they want to do a piece on racism online.

 If that's what they want at PR, that's what they get! Screw Java and his lackies.

[El Diablo]

Could the OP please provide some detailed insight as to why Javaray is the board's worst enemy.

I dunno, but coming over here from that horrendous circle-jerk of a board called the UTBBBB, Java is mild as hell compared to those asswipes over there.

Granted, I'm not as experienced on this site as most others, but from what I see of Java, he doesn't really bother me.

I ask, and ask on befalf of other inexperienced PR posters, what the hell is so wrong with Java that a thread is devoted to getting him canned from here.

I hear ya. I never agree with him on much at all but I kind of find him funny at times. I think all the Tebow and Ruud loving is really funny stuff... Lighten up people...and I hear people call him racist but I've missed those comments. If that is the case I would agree they should ban him but I have just not heard that.  Yes and if you are on here everyday posting get back to work.... or get a job.

[Tobias Funke]

Sincerely take an objective look at Java and all of his posts and you will realize that not only is he one of the funniest posters on this board, but the constant hordes of emotionally unstable children sobbing and sniveling at every letter he posts is infinitely more annoying.

[Morgan]

Java is level-headed and rarely will insult fellow posters - he'll just show them where they might be wrong and give his point of view.

The only irritation I find is his incessant Tebow and Gruden posts.

[Chief Joseph]

I was bored one day and looking for some entertainment. A friend told me that the circus was in town, and that they were the best entertainment around. I decided to go and check them out.

When I got there, I learned that all of the premier acts were under the Big Top, but you had to pay to get in. I decided to check out the midway first. There, they had all kinds of acts. There was Peanut Butter The Sword Swallower, Illuminator The Fire Breather, Benchwarmer The Mental Midget, Morgana The Bearded Lady, and many, many others. But the most popular attraction seemed to be Java The Jester, so I went in to check out his act. He was one of those comedians that mostly heckles the crowd, but in a non threatening way. I thought his act was a little stale, but the crowd was just eating it up. Someone in the crowd told me that almost all of his business was return customers. They just couldn't get enough.

Then, one of the customers went running out of the tent and down to the owner's trailer. The poor little nitwit pounded on the door and furiously demanded that The Jester be removed from the grounds. But the owner just rolled his eyes and said "It's entertainment, kid."

The poor little nitwit was rolling around on the ground sobbing uncontrollably and peeing his frilly panties, so I thought I might talk some sense into him. I said "Poor little nitwit, why don't you try ignoring The Jester?" But he would have none of it, and instead jumped up and ran straight back to Java's tent for more of the same.

And that was exactly how it happened. My friend was right though, it was entertaining as hell.

[Morgan]

question - is sword swallower a euphemism for something else in this story?

[Chief Joseph]

No sir, there is no euphemism, allegory, or metaphor here. It is a literal tale, and happened exactly as described at the Pewter Report Circus.

[3rd String Kicker]

Pewter report STOLE $10 from me when they went DIGITAL.....JavaRay works for pewter report. I'm flat out disgusted as I know many of you are as well. Let me here your thoughts before they delete this thread.

I remember when the company went digital, it was something they hinted at and when it happened it was frustrating. I remember paying $30 per year and getting that awesome magazine, next thing I knew, everything went digital and we had PDFs. I don't know that I could find a person on this board that would say, I don't want the physical magazine. It was great. Something I did one year because I wanted that physical copy, was ordered a printout of it from a third party, it was a draft special if I recall correctly. The PDFs are formatted as a magazine so it made that process easy. Of course doing this is expensive, but I was used to paying $30 for a subscription anyway. Since then, I don't really do that because the PDFs grew on me, but I don't think they are going to make everyone happy under the circumstances. I'm happy that we went from $30 to $10 anyway... and at one point I think I paid $5 for a subscription which is essentially five less beefy five layer burritos I would be eating that year.

If I were you and a company stole money from me, I would contact the company's customer support/subscriptions department to see about straightening the situation out. If that didn't resolve the situation, I would see that I have tangible documentation to prove the company's wrong doing and inform a local constable. Usually the customer service step resolves, but the second step almost always does it if the company isn't listening. The third step is going to court, which a company wouldn't do over $10, I'm sure they would settle. I'm not a big court person either, but I'm sure the company is going to try to say you're breaching defamation laws against them with your accusation as a defense, which shouldn't be a problem considering the tangible evidence. I don't know what a counter-suit is on defamation, but it's probably not that much. With all that said, I'm certain Pewter Report is an honest company and would work with you to resolve your situation.

Although I myself do not technically work for PewterReport, I can say to you that JavaRay does not work for the company (at least as far as I know). Perhaps this portion of your initial post was sarcasm, but I wanted to address it nevertheless. I know Mark and Scott try to read what goes on in the Red Board as much as they can, I'll let them know about your concerns immediately following the posting of this message. Furthermore, I do apologize if any of my above post has offended you as it was not my intention to do so, I'm not very experienced at making serious posts on this forum.

Sincerely,
Curt (3SK)

[Morgan]

makes for a good story - very creative prose -

[JavaRay]

I remember paying $30 per year and getting that awesome magazine

$40 a year for that magazine is also not a problem.   Loved it!   

In no way am I employed by PR.   That accusation is just plain ignorant.   

[Morgan]

I'll let them know about your concerns immediately following the posting of this message.
Sincerely,
Curt (3SK)

don't bother - he's a frickin' troll that posts drunk

[Chief Joseph]

I really liked the magazine as well, but as has been mentioned numerous times, it was no longer financially viable, and in no way was it time effective. People here complain about PR getting beat by someone on twitter by two minutes. How damned long do you think it takes to put together an entire magazine, get it printed, and have it sent bulk mail?

[Bucsfan x]

JavaRay, what will you change your name to if the Rays leave?

Might I suggest JavaBolt?

[3rd String Kicker]

I really liked the magazine as well, but as has been mentioned numerous times, it was no longer financially viable, and in no way was it time effective. People here complain about PR getting beat by someone on twitter by two minutes. How damned long do you think it takes to put together an entire magazine, get it printed, and have it sent bulk mail?

Well, time trials for Abby were down this year. She's a good breed of horse, but I don't think she can deliver as fast as she used to and police have warned us that if they find anymore droppings on Dale Mabry, we're going to have to put her down. It doesn't help matters that our horse riding midget Charlie Campbell left for Walter Football.

[Buc on the Move]

The Pewter Report Circus memoir was flat out brilliant.  Great image, and how I will view the RedBoard for quite sometime.