Best way to get fired?

[GhostRider]

What do you mean that companies can't say anything negative. If an former employee who was a dirtbag uses my name as a reference, I'll truthfully tell anyone checking references. Wouldn't have it any other way.

And if it keeps him for landing the job, and he can prove it in court, you will be held liable for damages.

[John Galt?]

Banging your bosses wife.

Think that has also been tested by Java, and he wasn't fired.

I would never have sex with a married woman.  I won't even date women who have a boyfriend.   They have to be completely available.   I do have ethics...

Unless she has a glass eye:

[Morgan]

lol

[GhostRider]

BUSTED

[dalbuc]

What do you mean that companies can't say anything negative. If an former employee who was a dirtbag uses my name as a reference, I'll truthfully tell anyone checking references. Wouldn't have it any other way.

Only thing we can say is Eligible for Rehire or Not Eligible for Rehire....nothing else.

[kmitchell]

Banging your bosses wife.

Think that has also been tested by Java, and he wasn't fired.

I would never have sex with a married woman.  I won't even date women who have a boyfriend.   They have to be completely available.   I do have ethics...

Unless she has a glass eye:

Promise Ring! haha not!

[NovaBuc]

Getting fired is a bad idea, it looks bad on your resume (and if you've been working there a significant amount of time, it's impossible to leave it off the resume) and in most states getting fired will disqualify you from receiving unemployment.

Incorrect on both counts. First off, getting fired is no big deal, because companies cannot say anything negative about a former employee for fear of being sued. You can simply tell the next employer that you were "laid off" or "downsized". Second, in most states it's nearly impossible for an employer to win an unemployment battle. Even when the employee is fired for documented cases of theft, etc, the employer will still have to pay.


Java--most married women you find out by themselves are so sexually dissatisfied that they become very easy pickins. When I was single, one of my sources of poon was military wives. They were an easy low hanging fruit...

 It's generally not a good idea to sue someone for telling the truth, it tends to significantly reduce your chances of winning your case. And there are plenty of ways to get the point across when someone calls for a reference or to inquire about work history without saying anything slanderous. Having a gap on your resume where you show no employment is generally a bad idea, unless you are looking for minimum wage-ish work. Most competant employers are going to wonder why you have a large gap in your employment history if it is more than a couple of months, and they are likely to think of it as a negative against you.

 And you're incorrect about the unemployment issue. In most states it is harder to get unemployment if you are fired for reasons other than being laid off or being a seasonal worker. You can appeal and if the employer cannot show just cause, the states will give you the unemployment. But if they show the firing was justified (ie your own negligance), you won't get unemployment. Now, some companies won't bother to show up at the appeal process, but you cannot count on that.

take a big crap directly onto your boss' desk. That should do the trick

[GhostRider]

Find an online donkey show and mass email the link to the entire company.  Title it "Urgent--Company Policy Changes".

[olafberserker]

Make a video of yourself putting boogers on a sandwich and post it on youtube.

[Skull and Bones]

Banging your bosses wife.

Think that has also been tested by Java, and he wasn't fired.

I would never have sex with a married woman. I won't even date women who have a boyfriend. They have to be completely available. I do have ethics...

what if she has a pimp?

[spartan]

What do you mean that companies can't say anything negative. If an former employee who was a dirtbag uses my name as a reference, I'll truthfully tell anyone checking references. Wouldn't have it any other way.

Only thing we can say is Eligible for Rehire or Not Eligible for Rehire....nothing else.

I believe they can ask if you would rehire that person again. If you say no, everybody reads (correctly) between the lines.

[GhostRider]

What do you mean that companies can't say anything negative. If an former employee who was a dirtbag uses my name as a reference, I'll truthfully tell anyone checking references. Wouldn't have it any other way.

Only thing we can say is Eligible for Rehire or Not Eligible for Rehire....nothing else.

I believe they can ask if you would rehire that person again. If you say no, everybody reads (correctly) between the lines.

Literally, verbatim all you can do is answer Eligible or Not Eligible for re-hire and only if asked.  You cannot offer that information.

I do have ethics...

LMAO!!!