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krazybuc

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: May 24, 2007, 06:04:22 PM

... Not really mine, but a few random thoughts that I've collected over the years that make sense and make me feel better to know I ain't the only one that feels this way.



-Your life only sucks because you suck, grow up, stop blaming everything but yourself.

-Most people with low self-esteem have earned it

-We should go back to having a king instead of a government, this way, if the king screws up as bad as our government, we can just kill him and move on to the next king. Much simpler.

-The next time some pain in the ass is preaching about your voting rights, remind them that Hitler was elected in a full democratic election.

-Before technology came along, mother nature used to weed out the weak and stupid and acted as our population control.... remember that the next time your child tries to walk into oncoming traffic or stick a knife into the electric socket...it's just mother nature doing her job... do us all a favor, let her work.

-Newsflash: Listening to a certain type of music does NOT make you who you are. Country does not make you a cowboy, Rock does not make you a bad ass, and HELLO, Rap does not make you a gangster, get over it. Dress the parts if you want, but stop talkin like you've had the rough life when you've lived in a suburb your whole life.... loser.

-Another Newsflash: Bowling & Golf are not sports. They are GAMES. Something to do when you're bored. Playing them does not make you an athlete.... They're dumb games at that.

-Stop letting every 'man of god' scare you into a 'good life'. God is not going to punish you for eating meat, saying god damn it, or telling a nun to go screw herself. God loves you, organized religion doesn't. They want to control every aspect of your life. You can believe and worship god just as well from home as you can at some overpriced church with a bunch of fake ass people.

-Airport security is STILL a JOKE. Do you honestly feel safer because somebody checked your shoes, or under your hat?

-I have no problem with 'under god' being in the pledge or on our money, however, I have a HUGE problem with churches not paying taxes on anything. Am I the only one that thinks that's hypocritical?

-Cats are for girls, Dogs are for boys. That's just the way it is.

-Remembering exactly where you were when some famous person died is a meaningless exercise. It's an attempt by ordinary people to connect their lame lives to important events. Knock it off.

-Seriously, why is prostitution illegal? It's an orgasm, you're selling an orgasm. You can give it away for free, but the minute you price it you're goin to jail. That's idiotic. I can go to WalMart and buy a 12 pack of beer and a shotgun in the same trip, but I can't spend a 20 on a blowjob from a willing participant? Somethings very wrong there.

-Seriously, there were slaves in the world long before America was born. Rome had thousands of white slaves, Egypt had thousands of black slaves. The first black slaves were brought to New America by Spanish slave trader. White people did not invent slavery, they did use it, as did the rest of the world. If you're gonna whine about something, atl east do your homework on the subject.

-On the topic of stupidity, white rednecks from Kentucky that can't freakin read above a 6th grade level... STOP VOTING A-holes! Thanks for nothing.

-Men know that the television remote is the best invention ever.... it can only be made better if there was a button that allowed you to kill the person on screen.

-When you go to the movies, shut up. Turn off your phone, you're not cool. Don't talk through the movie, you're not alone. And please, for the love of everything holy, chew quietly and stop digging through the popcorn bag like a gerbil. We don't want to hear your popcorn, your candy, your loud mouth or your gay ass ringtone. If you feel that paying for your seat gives you the right to do what you want while you're there, then the rest of us should have the right to shoot you in the face when you act like an ignorant a-hole.

-Fan is short for Fanatic. Fanatic meaning that whatever team you are a fanatic of is the ONE team you can not live without. Your passion is that ONE team. You can not have a passion for TWO teams in the same sport. You can like another team, but NO you are not a FAN of the other team. Stop being a flag waver and pick a team. Stick with it.

-Bet you didn't realize, right from the get go this country was founded by idiots. "We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union" Let me know if you see the problem with that statement. Is it any surprise we still have idiots running this country?

-Why do they have suicide watch for people on Death Row?

-Please, seriously, learn **CENSORED**ing english. When we go to your country, we at least take the time to learn a few words and pick up a translation dictionary.

-You can no rehabilitate someone who gets off on kids. There's no reason for them to exist. Kill them, let's move on.

-Parents, find better ways to boost your child's self esteem than to advertise his 'A' in 6th grade on your bumper.

-Also, stop blaming the internet and video games for violence when you're using them as a babysitter because you're too **CENSORED**ing pathetic to actually spend any real time with your children. Learn how to PARENT.

-Bulimia and Anorexia are NOT diseases. They're lame excuses for attention. Don't cave, just enjoy the extra food and let em die.

-Athletes... God doesn't care if you catch a touchdown or hit a homerun. Really, he doesn't. Means jack-**CENSORED** to him. At the very least, if you're gonna thank him for a catch, blame him for a drop. Fair's fair.





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#1 : May 24, 2007, 06:43:55 PM

sounds like this came from George Carlin.

krazybuc

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#2 : May 24, 2007, 06:46:08 PM

sounds like this came from George Carlin.

some from Carlin, some from Larry Winget, some with my own twist.

Buckaroo55

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#3 : May 24, 2007, 06:55:59 PM

Alot of truth but kind of on the dark side.


spartan

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#4 : May 24, 2007, 07:08:08 PM



-The next time some pain in the butt is preaching about your voting rights, remind them that Hitler was elected in a full democratic election.



Newsflash: You have no right to vote!!

John Galt?

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#5 : May 24, 2007, 08:29:10 PM


Quote
-The next time some pain in the butt is preaching about your voting rights, remind them that Hitler was elected in a full democratic election.



I don't know who said that, but it is completely wrong.
Germany had a parlimentary system, the people did not directly vote for the chancellor.  Members of the Richstagg elected a Chancelor.
Since there where about 10 different parties, no majority existed, so Bismark appointed Hitler Chancellor.

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